I have dealt with my share of snobs, particularly, the mean girl snobs in high school who showed-off their family riches to the middle class kids. Highschool was temporary, so I was able to get over the disrespect quickly. However, once I met dessert snobs, I struggled to be the bigger person. In my opinion, cookie and dessert snobs are the worst types of snobs. These are the people who think themselves too superior to eat packaged cookies, or find people cruel and heartless for daring to use eggs. Snobs turn up their noses at ingredients which do not come from farmers markets, and may only patronize grocery stores that support local art programs.
In the past, I had ready ‘clap-backs’ for such snobs, although I concede that these were not my brightest moments. Fortunately, I became wiser and adopted a classier way to deal with them.
How can you deal with snobs?
1. Snobs are everywhere, so be ready
In the west, food snobs are a thriving population who have the loudest mouths and hold the biggest signs. Unfortunately, it is becoming more difficult to avoid them. This is why I have chosen to “be prepared”. I am ready for them at a work social, and even at a church bake sale. My mental preparedness includes quick answers, and conversational curveballs. Prepping for a snob does not mean that I want to engage them in a discussion. Instead, the intention is to be ready should a snob decide to lecture me on how unworthy my choices are.
2. Remain cooler than an Oreo icecream sandwich
I get it. Staying cool is easier said than done, but it is absolutely needed. Snobs feed on attention like a mosquito feeds on blood. They flaunt their superiority, and are quick to dismiss the creations of others. Cookie snobs want you to feel bad about using plain o’l brown sugar instead of organic Agave syrup. But you know what? you are bigger than that. Remain cool and ask them to donate 50 liters of Agave so that you can have plenty for your future baking projects.
3. Play like it’s your first time baking
This is where you act ignorant and pretend you have no idea that white flour is bleached, or that cow’s milk isn’t vegan after all. Playing like you’re a rookie adds light humour and will help to diminish the situation. For example:
Cookie snob: eww you used white chocolate? that’s not ‘REAL chocolate!
Me: really? but its REAL tasty in my mouth!
Cookie snob: switch to chickpea flour, its healthier
Me: I don’t put flowers in my desserts, but there’s an idea.
Cookie snob: I’m disappointed! You didn’t make these gluten free.
me: Sorry! But I made them highfalutin free, does this count?
The objective here is to respond in a carefree manner which sometimes succeeds in making snobs smile. (but only sometimes)
4. Avoid the taunt
When I was younger, I saved my treats just so I could eat them in front of my siblings when they did not have any. This was one of the ways I repaid them for past infractions. It gave me pleasure to see their eyes fill with envy as I delicately ate candy bars and baked goods. But my triumphs were short lived because my parents forced me to share in order to teach me a lesson on ‘taunting’. Resisting the urge to taunt can be as difficult as a bacon lover’s attempt to refuse free bacon. Sometimes you itch to put snobs in their place. However, would this not mean that their snobbery has succeeded? Move on! You already know that your macadamia nut cookies are to die for. You do not need to defend them to a snob.
5. Ask more questions than the ingredients in a million dollar cookie
When a food snob objects to your choice of margarine over butter, begin an open-ended question session. For example, ask them why butter is better. What are the long term effects of using margarine? has it been proven that butter makes cookies more delicious? encourage them to expound on their knowledge and never accept ‘google it‘ for an answer. Too often, people have strong opinons about what others should or should not do, but they don’t walk with enough information to support their perspectives. Who knows, you may begin a long term friendship, or the snob will choose to quietly avoid you the next time!
I hope these recommendations will be useful when you encounter a dessert snob. Overall, like swift says: “shake it off“, and do not allow a snob to spoil your day. Smile and nod, and keep baking delicious treats just the way you like them.
How do YOU handle a dessert snob?